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Kjoy's Life in the Sr Lane: Saved by 'Star Wars' – surviving work and coming out with Princess Leia
A group of coworkers coordinated a showing of the ORIGINAL no enhancements version of “Star Wars” tonight. It was a geekfest of the best kind. Booing at Darth Vader, cheering for Hans Solo, being torn over my lust for Princess Leia Organa, and of course the cuteness of the whining, youthful Luke Skywalker, not to mention the awesome Chewbacca! We ate homemade kettlecorn and popcorn, and for a few hours, the workplace was transformed into a cinmaaplex and didn’t feel like a life-trap, but a fun place to be. SHOCKING!
People talked of where they were when the saw the original release in mid-May 1977, and who they were with. For some reason I don’t remember who I saw it with, but that was my graduation year, and the year my feelings for girls, not just Princess Leia, were about to burst out of my open heart like the creature in “Alien,” but that film hadn’t come out yet.
In 1977 I was about to graduate high school and was struggling over my love of Patti P., and my faith… Anyway, the psychiatrist my mother sent me to when I told her I was having a crisis, said my feelings for girls was “Senioritis”- I’m not kidding – and that I was just suffering separation anxiety. After a pep-talk, he gave me body-and-mind relaxation tapes and sent us away. Of course I knew it was more than that, but I didn’t have the guts yet to tell my mom or Patti P., or challenge God on the issue, so the tapes held me together through graduation.
So tonight sitting there watching Princess Leia’s breasts bounce in her flowing outfit and her kicking ass everywhere, I was taken back. Back to time when I fanaticized of owning the Millennium Falcon ship and thrusting it into warp speed with Princess Leia (who was Patti P. in my script) and how the two of us burst into the cosmos. Out there I hoped we’d escape the inevitable coming out fiasco by landing on Planet Lesbos, and once there we’d be far from God’s striking distance when we uttered out-loud, “We’re gay” then lived happily ever after. Yeah, that was a great night’s sleep.
Now a 52 SR and having survived the coming-out saga, several lovers past Patti P. to the arms of my Corinne, and the realization that God/esses love us no matter what, seeing “Star Wars” took on a playful zest. I had survived many attacks of the “Dark Force” over the years and had come out smiling, secure, happy, and semi-successful. Not bad.
“May the force be with you,” is still one of the most powerful lines in film.
As we all walked out through the office we seemed a bit stronger and taller as we left the rows of computers and headsets that defined us during the day. I thought: “Tonight we have defeated you. Come 9:30 am you will have your powers back again, but not tonight, now we are Jedi Knights,” and walked out the doors.]]> -
Transgender woman touring Kansas in awareness effort this 4th of July weekend
It’s Manhattan . . . Kansas, where Stephanie Mott on Friday started a statewide tour to raise awareness of transgender issues.
From KTA.com:
Topeka — In an effort to raise awareness about transgender issues, a kick-off rally was held in Manhattan Friday morning. The Kansas Transgender Education Project executive director Stephanie Mott will be traveling throughout Kansas to spread the word about transgender and sexual orientation issues. In particular, Mott will address some misunderstandings people have about lesbians, gays, bisexuals and the transgendered. “This is wrong. It is wrong to terminate somebody’s employment because they happen to be LGBT. It’s wrong to deny somebody housing because they are LGBT. It’s wrong to say someone can’t come in this place just because they’re LGBT. There’s nothing about who I am that has anything to do with whether or not that I can do a good job or whether or not I’ll be a good tenant or whether or not I’ll come into a place and be an inappropriate customer,” says Mott. From the group’s Facebook page (it may be archived by the time you read this): My name is Stephanie Mott. My dream came true today. Interested persons from the across Kansas gathered to birth the Kansas Statewide Transgender Education Project (K-STEP) What is K-STEP? It is a group of transgender people, their families, all supporters, and interested professionals (psychotherapy, human resources, education, the faith community) who are dedicated to providing transgender education across Kansas. Thanks to all have supported K-STEP to this point in any way. Get ready, here we come. And last but not (to me) least, see a separate article about Stephanie “finding her way back to Christ” at the Topeka MCC. I repeatedly maintain that one of the greatest harms done to lgbt youth and adults is the lie that our lives are not compatible with faith. That’s not an advertisement – it’s probably easier being gay than being an atheist in a lot of places – but many churches welcome us with loving arms. And don’t you let anyone tell you otherwise!]]> -
Duluth group kicks off fight against Minnesota marriage amendment
I used to go to Minneapolis every year to visit a friend I’d known since high school. He permanently unfriended me seven years ago with no explanation (there’s a blog post in there somewhere – and the guy’s not even on Facebook). So it was with some despair I saw that Minnesota, and Indiana, where I grew up, are still going retro with the anti-gay, hostile, Republican-led charges to scar their state constitutions with marriage amendments. One group in Duluth is leading the push for a different outcome.
From the Duluth News Tribune:
While many will celebrate Independence Day with fireworks and grilled food, one group in Duluth will kick off its fight against a Minnesota marriage amendment.
The event Monday is sponsored by Duluth United for All Families, a group formed after the Minnesota House voted 70-62 to put an amendment on next year’s ballot that would define marriage as the union of a man and a woman. The group is affiliated with Minnesotans United for All Families, a statewide coalition.
“Our event will galvanize critical support to defeat the marriage amendment in 2012,” said Gary Anderson, an event organizer. “This is just the beginning.”
After the New York Legislature’s legalization of gay marriage, Minnesota has become the newest front line in the national battle. Gay-
marriage supporters here will be working fervently to end a 31-state losing streak at the polls and defeat the proposed marriage amendment. “We want Minnesota to be the first to defeat the amendment, with Duluth leading the way,” Anderson said.
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Doctors see rise in number of transgender youth
Photograph by: Pierre Obendrauf, Postmedia News, Postmedia News The reality of being transgender wasn’t something that ever occurred to me growing up. I was dealing with being a self-aware gay child and the stresses of being openly gay as a teenager, so the fact there were kids going through something even more challenging wasn’t in my consciousness. I think it’s only been in the last decade or so that transgender and gender identity issues have come into the broader public consciousness, and we still have a long way to go. From the Vancouver Sun: At age five, Shamai was a boy in a little girl’s body. He remembers demanding a short haircut and when a lady on the street “mistook” him for a boy, turning to his mother and saying: “This lady knows better than you. She knows I’m a boy.” In her first recollection that something was wrong, Samantha had this vague sense it didn’t feel right to be in a boy’s body. “I didn’t know what it was. I prayed for a while for things to work out.” She was four years old. James was three years old -and a girl on the outside -when he blurted out to his family: “I was a boy before. What happened?” For years it was a family joke. They are transgender youth, all in their 20s now, from different backgrounds but with stories that are similar: moments of childhood clarity when they realized they weren’t who they appeared to be. [SNIP] National statistics are impossible to find, but counsellors and doctors say they’ve been seeing a steady increase over the last five years in the number of young people seeking advocacy groups, hormone therapy and finally surgery for maleto-female (MTF) or female-tomale (FTM) changes. That increase is attributed in part to greater awareness and support within the community, and better access to sex reassignment surgery. B.C., Saskatchewan, Alberta, Manitoba, Quebec and Newfoundland cover costs of the procedure, which is most often performed in Montreal at the Centre Metropolitain de Chirurgie Plastique. While some professionals continue to see gender identity issues as psychological, ongoing research is moving toward the hypothesis of biological changes that take place in the womb rather than environmental influences.
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Interview: David Webb – The Rare Reporter
When I first launched lgbtSr.com I started looking around for contributors. The intention was to have a variety of voices and writers on the site. I was looking at different news items out there in the lgbt Intersphere (or blogiverse or webaxy or whatever you want to call it) and I saw some articles from a writer named David Webb (The Rare Reporter, as you’ll see). I reached out to David, we spoke on the phone that same day, and he’s been contributing since then. He’s a veteran reporter and I thought an interview would be a good way to get to know him better. I think you’ll agree.
David’s in Texas, by the way. I read his column in a Florida paper, called him from New York City, and here we are.
Why ‘The Rare Reporter’? Where did that come from?
DW: About 10 years ago when I was a staff writer for the Dallas Voice a public relations representative for Razzle Dazzle, an LGBT charitable event, was particularly pleased about a story I did announcing the upcoming event. The former television reporter called me and said that she viewed me as a rare reporter. It was unusual for me to get such a compliment because I often wrote about controversial issues that displeased a lot of people in the community. The publisher of the Dallas Voice and my colleagues thought it was humorous because I had been called so many unfavorable things in the past and they nicknamed me The Rare Reporter. When I started writing a column I struggled for a long time to create a name for it. Suddenly it occurred to me my moniker was The Rare Reporter, and so I made it official.
I first noticed your writing at South Florida Gay News and I know you’ve been reporting in the LGBT media for a long time. How did you get started?
DW: I worked in the mainstream media after my graduation from the University of Texas with a degree in journalism. I covered just about every beat imaginable for several years. In 1981 when I first heard about the “gay cancer” afflicting men in San Francisco I became intrigued and started reading everything I could find on the subject. When it became obvious that a horrible epidemic was spreading through the country and that cases had been found in Texas, I started seeking out patients, interviewing them and writing about AIDS. The epidemic sparked unprecedented activism by gay men and lesbians, and I started writing about that as well. I saw a great need for information because most mainstream newspapers in Texas shied away from the subject at first. Even alternative publications in Texas preferred to limit coverage of gay issues to the occasional small report. I remember having some pretty horrific arguments with an editor about her belief that I was devoting too much of my time to gay issues. Today, she acknowledges that she was wrong, and that I was correct that the issue was of huge importance to both gay and straight people.
What’s changed in the media landscape over the last couple of decades, with the advent of digital media and the seeming death of print?
DW: Print publications no longer can compete effectively in the area of breaking news. The public wants to know what is happening immediately and they turn to television and the Internet to satisfy that curiosity. Younger people simply don’t like to sit down with a newspaper. As a result subscriptions are down and so is advertising revenue. That has forced newspapers to drastically cut editorial staffs. There is less investigative reporting and a lot of news in smaller areas simply goes unreported because newspapers have become more oriented toward pleasing the community and not stirring up controversy. Newspapers are now struggling to present coverage of breaking news on the Internet as quickly as it happens, much like you see with television reporting. It is requiring print publication editors and reporters to become adept at multi-media skills to accomplish that goal. Newspapers are also struggling to find ways to generate income from their Web sites through subscriptions and advertising revenue.
You live in Texas. Is there a difference, and do you have a preference, for local reporting versus what you might write for, say,lgbtSr.com?
DW: Reporting for an LGBT audience — even in a large metropolitan area — is much like writing for a small town newspaper. The readers are far more engaged with the staff of LGBT newspapers than the readers of mainstream publications. It is often difficult to convince these readers that the reporting of news that portrays certain LGBT people and groups in an unfavorable light is as important as good news. There is less interaction with readers when I write for national publications. I like and am committed to both types of coverage so I guess an even mix of both best suits me.
Is there any advice you could offer someone new in the journalism game, regardless of their age?
DW: I think reporters and editors should be multi-skilled. Today, it is necessary to be able to shoot videos, take pictures, write, edit and stay abreast of all technological developments in media. Beyond that, I think journalists should learn a little bit about all media beats, such as crime, politics, sports, entertainment, business, etc., before deciding to specialize in any one area of coverage. The business is getting really competitive so a journalist who can do it all is obviously more valuable than one who has limited abilities.
Is there any one particular story you’ve covered or incident in your reporting career that stands out?
DW: I wrote an investigative story a few years ago about the large number of unsolved murders of gay men in the Dallas-Fort Worth area. That story sort of haunted me because it appeared clear that all of these men were killed by someone whom they had met for an anonymous sexual encounter. It is sort of spooky to know there is a killer or several killers out there somewhere who lured gay men to their deaths and are likely still free to kill again.
This site is primarily aimed for those of us over 50. What’s the best thing about living long enough to be in that category?
DW: After having watched countless friends die during the AIDS epidemic, I’m just grateful to be alive today. I feel fortunate to be able to pursue the work I love and my other interests, such as travel, my friends, my family, my pets, nature, the arts and whatever else attracts my attention. I have a much greater appreciation for life today than I did 30 years ago.]]> -
Tired Old Queen at the Movies, #78 – ‘Lost Horizon’
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Kaiser Permanente gets high marks for LGBT healthcare
When my partner Jim was going through his losing struggle with HIV/AIDS in the late 1980s (he died in 1991) we often went to Kaiser Permanente in Hollywood. They were excellent there and treated me as his partner, and I’ll never forget that. Now Kaiser Permanente in Vallejo and 22 other Bay Area hospitals are being praised for their treatment of lgbt people and our health needs.
From the Times Herald: The country’s largest gay rights group has rated a local hospital a leader in LGBT healthcare equality. In a report released Thursday, the Human Rights Campaign noted Kaiser Permanente Vallejo Medical Center and 22 other Bay Area hospitals received perfect ratings in the Washington, D.C., -based group’s Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Healthcare Equality Index. “The biggest thing is, at Kaiser Permanente, we equate good health and thriving with getting your care at a place that you’re comfortable and is supportive of your needs, whatever they may be — cultural, sexual orientation, language. The recognition from the Human Rights Campaign of that conviction is just very much appreciated,” said Ellen Leonard, vice president of health plan and hospital operations. The Human Rights Campaign surveyed 87 health care providers across the country, representing about 375 facilities, including 25 in the Bay Area.
“We’ve actually experienced twice as many (respondents) this year as opposed to last year,” said Tom Sullivan, deputy director for the Human Rights Campaign Family Project. The survey, now in its fifth year, is a voluntary one and rates health care providers on four criteria: patient non-discrimination policies, LGBT visitation policies, cultural training and employee non-discrimination policies.
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Chicago gay rights activist Andy Thayer home from Russia
There was a lot of news recently about lgbt activists in Russia, including Lt. Dan Choi, being arrested and mistreated by Moscow police during demonstrations there. One of those activists, Andy Thayer from Chicago – a founding member of the Gay Liberation Network – returns to tell the tale.
From CBS Chicago:
CHICAGO (CBS) — A Chicago gay-rights activist who was arrested in Russia by Moscow police during a pride demonstration last month is back home and talking about the experience.
American Andy Thayer, co-founder of the Gay Liberation Network, was one of more than a dozen demonstrators who planned to march in the Russian capital. They never got the chance. Russian nationalists attacked them first, and then the demonstrators were dragged off by police.
Thayer watched a video of the incident with CBS 2’s Mike Parker and called the actions by the mob and police “infuriating.”
“A transgender activist was kicked four to five times on the pavement and another activist, a lesbian activist, was hospitalized for about four or five days,” Thayer said.
Thayer said he was grabbed by a man with close-cropped hair and a camouflage outfit. He believes the man was one of the “neo-fascists” he said were attacking demonstrators.
The arrests near Red Square came on May 28, shortly after the European Court of Human Rights criticized the Russian government for refusing to allow gay-pride demonstrations.]]> -
Column: Rick Perry, ex-gay therapy, and the damage done
By David Webb – The Rare Reporter
Sometimes the comments posted by readers of LGBT newspapers provide a fascinating glimpse into the mindsets of our community’s greatest adversaries because they are often part of the audience.
One that caught my eye recently was posted by a reader who objected to criticism directed against Texas Gov. Rick Perry for agreeing to headline the annual dinner on Oct. 28 of the anti-gay group Cornerstone Action in New Hampshire. The announcement was seen as further evidence that Perry is leaning toward running for the Republican Party’s presidential nomination in 2012 because New Hampshire is the first presidential primary state.
That put Perry on the LGBT community’s radar again because Cornerstone Action advocates the repeal of the state’s same-sex marriage law, and it promotes the work of ex-gay therapy groups such as Exodus International, Love Won Out, and the National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuality. The conversion therapy practiced by these groups has been denounced by the American Psychological Association, which refutes the notion that homosexuality is a mental illness.
The offended reader who was obviously a proponent of ex-gay therapy and a fan of Perry’s wrote, “Many, many people tormented with same-sex attraction have benefited from therapy. The homosexual pressure groups have no moral right to speak for these individuals.”
Only one reason comes to mind why someone would feel tormented by same-sex attraction, and that would be a result of being taught that homosexuality is evil and an aberration. Those same teachings would make someone who is heterosexual fear and despise someone who is openly gay. And if someone is gay and doesn’t want to be, it’s pretty easy to see how they would express homophobic opinions to help keep their shameful secret.
Groups such as Exodus International claim in public relations releases that they are not attempting to influence “people who are perfectly happy living their gay life,” but the readers’ remarks make it clear they are monitoring everything we do by reading our publications. They also attend our public events surreptitiously when they are not staging protests, which prompts the question, “Why all the interest if suppression is not their goal?” Perry’s camp announced the New Hampshire engagement after his appearance the previous weekend at the Republican Leadership Conference in New Orleans where the participants, who were enamored of his conservative social and fiscal policies, reportedly shouted “Run, Rick, run.” The announcement of the New Hampshire appearance was viewed as humorous by some because it followed on the heels of the re-emergence of widespread rumors that Perry is secretly gay and that his wife, Anita, almost divorced him in 2007 over it. The rumors that the governor’s wife caught him involved in a sexual act with another high-level male government official became so widespread four years ago that Perry denied them in an Austin newspaper story, calling them a “political smear campaign.” A spokesman for the governor has acknowledged his staff is prepared to address the rumors again should he run for the presidential nomination. Although almost no one actually believes Perry is secretly gay, his alignment at this point with a group so involved with the promotion of anti-gay therapy seems a little peculiar. After all, many of the proponents of ex-gay therapy claim they are recovered homosexuals, and several have been exposed by gay activists as frauds who still engage in same-sex activity. With all of the rumors that previously circulated about Perry being gay and others claiming he cheated on his wife with other women, it would seem like the governor and his staff might be concerned that the next wild tale could be that he went to ex-gay therapy. If not, maybe the governor thinks this is a way of appearing to be compassionate toward a group of people his actions seem to indicate he despises. Having talked with several of Perry’s and his wife’s high school and college acquaintances – some of whom are gay and lesbian — over the years, I doubt that Perry was always so intolerant and self-righteous. In fact, I understand the governor sowed quite a few wild oats in his younger years, to put it in the vernacular of his West Texas roots. But somewhere along the line during his 26-year career in Texas politics, Perry, who is a Methodist, apparently realized that conservative religious zealots would propel him to fame, fortune and power if he pandered to them. That unfortunately puts the LGBT community in the crosshairs of Perry’s aim so it is a real possibility that the rest of the nation is going to experience what it is like to live in a state where an over-the-top, anti-gay elected official sets the political tone. David Webb is a veteran journalist who has covered LGBT issues for the mainstream and alternative media for three decades. E-mail him at davidwaynewebb@yahoo.com.]]> -
NLGJA announces Excellence in Journalism Awards winners
lgbtSr will be attending this year’s National Lesbian and Gay Journalists Association convention in Philadelphia (August 25-28). They’ve just announced the 2011 recipients of their Excellence in Journalism Awards. You can read the entire list here.]]> -
5 of a kind: new fiction now available as Amazon eBook!
Finally . . . new fiction now available as an eBook! Next up: the Kyle Callahan mystery series (it’s time to have some sleuthing fun). First up – ‘Murder at Rainbow Lodge.’ Look for it in early 2012 (or sooner if I can help it).]]> -
Rhode Island Senate passes civil union bill – activists not happy
The Rhode Island Senate has passed a civil union bill, which the governor has said he’ll most likely sign. While it may seem surprising, a number of lgbt activists are opposed to the bill and urged the governor to veto it. Apparently it includes extreme “religious exemptions” that allow both organizations and individuals to essentially ignore the civil unions. For instance, in theory, if someone was in a Catholic hospital, the hospital could refuse their civil-unioned partner admission to the room. If it passes we’ll have to see how this actually plays out.
From the New York Times:
PROVIDENCE, R.I. — Less than a week after same-sex marriage was legalized in New York, the Rhode Island State Senate on Wednesday evening approved a bill allowing not marriage, but civil unions for gay couples, despite fierce opposition from gay rights advocates who called the legislation discriminatory.
The bill, which already passed in the state’s House of Representatives and which the governor said he was likely to sign, grants gay and lesbian couples most of the rights and benefits that Rhode Island provides married couples. It was offered as a compromise this spring after Gordon D. Fox, the openly gay speaker of the Democratic-controlled House, said he could not muster enough votes to pass a same-sex marriage bill.
Gay rights advocates say the bill is unacceptable because it allows religious organizations not to recognize the unions. For example, they say, a Catholic hospital could choose not to allow a lesbian to make medical decisions on behalf of her partner, and a Catholic university could deny family medical leave to gay employees.
“It’s a permission slip to ignore legal obligations,” said Karen L. Loewy, a lawyer at Gay and Lesbian Advocates and Defenders, or GLAD. [emphasis mine]]]> -
IBM, Raytheon start trend in dropping domestic partnership benefits?
This isn’t too much of a surprise. Now that same-sex marriage is legal in New York (as of July 25), two large companies, IBM and Raytheon, are dropping their domestic partnership benefits. If lgbt couples want to keep them, they’ll have to get married. While this seems unfair on one hand (not all domestic partners are same-sex!), a case can be made from a corporate perspective: domestic partnership benefits were started because we could not get married. Take the sidebar survey and let us know what you think!
From Fins Technology:
The legalization of gay marriage in New York means some couples may have to walk down the aisle for the most practical of reasons: to hold onto their partners’ health insurance and other benefits. At least two major employers — Raytheon Co. and International Business Machines Corp. — say New York employees in same-sex relationships now will have to get married if they want to qualify for the benefits. The companies appear to be the exceptions among big corporate employers.
Most have continued to offer domestic-partner benefits — health care being the most common — to workers with same-sex partners in the states that recognize gay marriage. Currently, 37% of Fortune 1000 companies provide domestic-partner benefits, according to a 2011 study by Williams Institute, a think tank at UCLA’s School of Law that researches sexual orientation in law and public policy.]]>