• Interviews

    Interview: Stephanie Mott

    August 1, 2011 /

    By Mark McNease I first learned about Stephanie Mott when I saw an article on an educational tour she did through Kansas last July 4th weekend. After posting about it on this site, Stephanie dropped me a “thank you” email and I thought, what a terrific voice to add to the site. I wrote her back, and now we’re including her monthly columns. We also spoke on the phone and she’s as terrific as I thought she’d be. She was generous enough to share the following interview with me. MM: I’m delighted to have your columns on lgbtSr and wanted to give the readers a chance to get to know you. I first heard about you from reading of your educational tour through Kansas over the 4th of July weekend. What prompted that, and how do think it turned out? SM: I was just thinking about what to do over the long weekend, and the thought came into my head. People are always traveling across the country, or across the state for a cause. Once I had the thought, I think I just pretty much had to do it. The tour was undoubtedly one of the most remarkable four day stretches of my life. I connected on multiple occasions with people who knew a transgender person who was struggling in their journey. Had that happened only once, the tour would have been worth it. I also connected with people who wanted to know more, with people who were kind and accepting, and with a few people who were less kind. What I didn’t expect from the tour, was that I would look at myself in a different light. Is my prejudice against someone whose appearance suggests conservatism, getting in the way of my effectiveness as a transgender educator? How does that balance with my own safety? My upcoming column will describe the tour in greater detail. MM: I saw on your Facebook page that you recently celebrated four years of being Stephanie. Can you elaborate on that? SM: It is as if someone turned on a light. As though someone opened the door through which the nightmare is not allowed to follow. The impossible comes true in my life every day. There is a scene from the movie, “Fried Green Tomatoes”, during which Evelyn Couch (Kathy Bates) is telling her husband that she wants Ms. Threadgood (Jessica Tandy) to come live in their home. She explains to her husband how Ms. Threadgood has changed her life, and her husband asks, “What’s changed?” Evelyn says, “The air and the light”. Early in my transition, I spoke at a local high school Gay/Straight Alliance. I was horribly nervous and only spoke for a few minutes. After that presentation, a 17-year-old transgender person came up to me and said, “Oh my God, you changed my life.” In that moment, my life changed as well. I knew that I had to share about my journey. It would be understandable for a person to be bitter about the lost almost 50 years, but then I would have missed the last four years as well. I am blessed with the opportunity to take something horrible, and create something good. The last four years, have been so incredibly amazing, far more wonderful than I could have possibly imagined..
    MM: Another part of your story that caught my attention is that you’re a member of Metropolitan Community Church of Topeka. I’ve been with MCC New York for about 17 years now. I think one of the greatest harms done to lgbt youth and adults is the lie that our lives are not compatible with faith. Can you speak to the place of faith in your life? SM: When I was trying to live as a man, I was in conflict with God. When I embraced the woman God created me to be, I came into harmony with God. The lie, and it is a lie, that you can’t be LGBT and have a relationship with God, kept me separated from God for a very long time. Then I found MCC of Topeka. My second time at MCC, Pastor Paul Evans did a sermon on II Corinthians 5:17, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, they are a new creature. Old things are passed away. Behold, all things are become new.” I am sure he was preaching to me. I knew then, that God would be there for me in my transition. My definition of faith is knowing that God will give me everything I need to do whatever God wants me to do. My analogy for faith is the child, leaping without fear, in complete joy, from the edge of the swimming pool, and landing in the waiting arms of a parent. It took a while for me to learn to leap with that kind of joy. All things did indeed, become new. MM: I know your life has had its challenges – alcoholism, homelessness, estranged from your family at times. But you’ve come through it in such an inspiring way. What would you most want to say to people faced with similar challenges – as so many of us are? SM: It is so easy to lose sight of what’s possible, when you are in the midst of what’s horrible. I had been so certain, for so long, that I could not let anyone into my soul. Fear, anger, doubt, and shame kept me from reaching out. I had forgotten what it felt like to be a part of life. I had to learn to believe that it was ok to reach out to someone and let them know about what was happening inside me. When I began to do that, the light began to find its way inside of me too. Be as true to yourself as you can be. It was not possible for me to discover the miracles of life while I was denying my soul the light of self acceptance. MM: I know you founded the Kansas State Transgender Education Project (K-STEP). How is that going?

    SM: K-STEP was a dream that was born on the day I cast away my “Steven suit”, On August 14, 2010, I brought together a number of people from across Kansas, and we formed a non-profit organization, Twelve days later, we incorporated. We are dedicated to bringing about an end to discrimination against transgender people and their families through education. We also provide resources for transgender people and their families. In our 11 months, we have provided over 65 educational forums and workshops. Some of them have been for PFLAG chapters and other friendly places. However, we have also done trainings for two major Kansas mental health centers, for one of the largest jails in the state, for a local health department, and for a number of faith communities. We just did a training for Ryan White Program case workers from across the state for Kansas Department of Health and Environment. It is hard to imagine that we could have come so far in such a short time. Two more major mental health centers, and one of the state’s largest county health departments are also on our upcoming schedule. MM: You’ve come such a long way, Stephanie. It really is a privilege to have you here on the site now as well. While it’s open to anyone to read (it’s online!), it is tailored to an over-50 readership. We believe life not only goes on, but goes on with a bang! Aside from being a little slower in the joints, I love being the age I am. Could you speak to life after 49? SM: I don’t feel old. Sometimes, my knees ache and all that. But I’ve never been more at peace. I have never been more able to experience the joys of life. I have experienced my second puberty at the age of 50. It has given me the opportunity to survive terror with a degree of dignity and grace. For reasons that are quite simple – in many ways I am only a few years old – life seems to have only just begun. I listened to two people one time talking about how this old woman did this, and this old woman did that. I asked them, “Just how old do you have to be to be an old woman?” They just stared at me. Then I said, “I would like to know, because someday, I would like to be one.”]]>

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    Flying Solo: Savoring Savannah, GA

    August 1, 2011 /

    A Travelogue with Rick Rose Like neighboring Charleston, the city of Savannah, Georgia is historic as all get out. What is way cool about the city is that it was laid out in 1733 around four open squares. The city plan anticipated growth and expansion of the grid. Additional squares were added during the 18th and 19th centuries, and by 1851 there were twenty-four squares in the city. Many of us know the city because of the recent fame brought to it by John Berendt’s best selling novel, “Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil” and subsequent Clint Eastwood movie. When you take a “Walk through Midnight” tour, you see the squares and learn the story of Savannah in a very amazing way. The true star here is the wonderful city itself. Guides offer personal insights and observations, as well as new stories that would create an incredible sequel or two. Many of the friendly guides were even extras in the movie and have added memorabilia to show you along the way. A two mile tour is spread out over just under two hours. Check out the tours here.

    Savannah has been rated by Walking Magazine as “one of the 10 Best Walking Cities in America.” The pristine squares and bordering tree-lined streets, incredible parks, and laid-back pace make Savannah an ideal location for leisurely and intimate vacationing where the heat of the South rarely gets to you. You can always hop in and out of air conditioning as you need to by touring the city’s many historic homes. My favorite and that of many other young girls (ha!) is the birthplace of the founder of the Girl Scouts of America, which has been a virtual mecca to nearly 3 million visitors since it began a restoration to splendor in the 1950s.
    Half way through the day, Susan and I grew hungry. As you can imagine, a Southern City has plenty to offer the weary walker. We chose www.mrswilkes.com for some rib-sticking Southern cooking. A line gathers each morning at 107 West Jones Street, the address of what was once and in some ways still is the boarding home of Mrs.Wilkes. Today the Wilkes’ kids swing the door open wide and friendly at 11 o’clock as they welcome a lunch crowd that scurries to find seats at one of the large tables-for-ten shared by strangers who over a meal become family, of sorts. Tabletops are crowded with platters of fried chicken and cornbread dressing, sweet potato souffle, biscuits, black-eyed peas, okra gumbo to name just a few of the dishes.
    You may want to enjoy a meal from the lineage of the Lady and her sons at http://www.ladyandsons.com. That’s right, Paula Dean calls Savannah home as do her sons. Every day of the week, the host at their establishment begins to take names at 9:30am for lunch and dinner on a first come first served basis from her famous podium on Congress Street in front of the restaurant. You must appear in person to receive a priority seating time. Sunday, the Dean clan offers up a scrumptious buffet from 11am until 5 pm. The wait at Wilkes is typically less, and it is more joyful for me to dine there, but Susan and I did check out the accompanying kitchen goods store to the Dean restaurant. Cool stuff can be purchased on the recommendation of Paula who clearly knows the need of those of us who love to cook. To complement your walking exploration, take a Carriage Ride; the horses in Savannah are some of the prettiest I have seen. When darkness covers the city, check out one of the many famous Irish pubs spread throughout the squares for a quick pint of Guiness or my favorite, a Black Smith (like a Black and Tan but with Smithwicks Irish beer). You willl need it to calm your nerves before you board the trolley of one of the city’s famous ghost tours (www.savannahtours.us). We screamed our way through basements of old homes that were left intact the day they were abandoned and many city cemeteries. I assure you that you will too. Take lots of pictures, as we did, because looking for the “orbs” in them afterwards is part of the fun. Savannah is filled with spirits. Speaking of spirits, there is a great LGBT scene in and around the beautiful riverwalk where drinking happens all day long! If you get energized you can join in for some spirited gay volleyball which is played every Sunday in Daffin Park from 2 to 6 in the afternoon. www.gaysavannah.com is undoubtedly one of the best directories and magazines I have seen in any city. It will guide you to places of interest that range from antiquing to green living. An added bonus for me on this trip was meeting Ronni Carpenter, whose grandparents owned a general store out in the countryside of Savannah. There they sold shoes made in Hannibal, MO during the days that followed WWI when Hannibal was the largest shoe manufacturer in the nation. It’s a fascinating piece of American history, and Ronni was kind enough to invite me and Susan and a couple friends who once lived in Hannibal over to see the shoes that survived over these many years. Savannah has survived and is currently thriving! Go check it, and let me know what you think! Travel deliciously, Rick

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    Review: NYC summer movie retrospectives

    July 30, 2011 /



    By Steve Barnes Summer in New York means a lot of things to different people, but one thing it has always meant to me is a time for the kind of movie retrospectives that move old standbys from TV screens back into theaters. Film Forum has always been the biggest kid on the block when it comes to this sort of programming, its summer series devoted to science fiction, film noir and the raciest examples of pre-Code movie making having become a staple for many New York filmgoers. And they’re at it again this year with “Essential Pre-Code,” which is going on through August 11. This year’s model of their pre-Code smorgasbord features a tribute to wonderfully smarmy Warren William and a series of Tuesday triple bills. One highlight yet to come in the series is a double feature (July 31 and August 1) of “Call Her Savage,” in which an over-the-top Clara Bow makes what many think of as the first visit to a gay bar in any Hollywood film, and “Blonde Venus,” with Marlene Dietrich channeling King Kong a year before he hit the screen in a performance of the song “Hot Voodoo.” And one of those Tuesday triple bills (August 2) is nothing to sneeze at either: Ruth Chatteron as a powerful executive in “Female,” followed by two shots of Bette Davis in “Cabin in the Cotton” and “Ex-Lady.”
    Over at Anthology Film Archives in the East Village, a retrospective devoted to movie musicals of the 1980s is running through August 9. While many of the movies being shown don’t quite hit the bar set by musicals from earlier decades, there are pleasures to be had here. Julien Temple’s “Absolute Beginners” (July 30, August 4 and 6) turns a story about the 1950s into a veritable 1980s time capsule, Francis Ford Coppola’s “One From the Heart” (August 5) puts its songs into the mouths of two outside commentators on the film’s story (Tom Waits and Crystal Gayle), and Robert Altman’s “Popeye” (August 3 and 8) features Shelley Duvall in the role that Altman said she was born to play—Olive Oyl.
    And I’ve saved the best—as well as the most ambitious—of the retrospectives for last. The Film Society of Lincoln Center is in the midst of presenting “Judy Garland: All Singin’, All Dancin’, All Judy.” (See http://www.filmlinc.com/films/series/judy-garland-all-singin-all-dancin-all-judy for tickets.) It’s running through August 9, and if there’s any Judy Garland picture you haven’t seen, it’s here. This is a real treat for fans, and an opportunity for people who haven’t seen her on screen to get a taste of what they’ve missed.
    Judy (I have a hard time making my hands type the words “Ms. Garland”) is a performer so much more interesting than the mythology surrounding her that it’s really necessary to pull back from her life story every now and then. The last emotions I would ever feel when watching her on screen are pity or pathos—I’m much more bowled over by her presence, energy and humor. What’s most amazing to me is how her body language and her reactions to other performers always seem so relaxed and casually thrown off, while always hitting the mark exactly where they’re supposed to. (For example, watch her dancing with Fred Astaire at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hrzo5SPaOvg). The only other actor I can compare her to in that regard is Elizabeth Taylor. Both of them have such a natural ability to be the center of any scene they’re in that they can wear their status as center of attention extremely lightly. They can dispense with any of vanity’s protective coverings, thanks to the assurance of knowing that they simply don’t need them.
    And Judy had that assurance right from the start. Just have a look at her (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_-5PGkg1yg0) at 14, singing “You Made Me Love You” to a picture of Clark Gable in “Broadway Melody of 1938” (screening on July 30 at 1 p.m.). This is no green kid making a tentative MGM debut—this is a trouper, a vaudeville pro who knows just what to do with the spotlight when she gets it. Somehow it seems very appropriate that the woman playing her mother in this sequence is one of the greatest vaudevillians of them all—Sophie Tucker.
    As important as her natural talent and assurance are, that early training on the vaudeville stage is also a big part of what makes Garland unique among major movie-musical stars. Sure, Al Jolson and Fanny Brice do have their moments in pictures. But Judy brought that same verve to over 30 films. She took the vaudevillian’s ability to grab an audience by the heartstrings—to make it laugh, cry and sing along with her—and made it work in the constantly shifting context of movie musicals from the 1930s through the 1960s. She is just as comfortable in George Cukor’s sprawling “A Star is Born” (July 31, August 5 and 9) as she was back in the days when she was known as Baby Gumm (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zRpT9jSNNX8&feature=related).
    Talking about highlights in a series like this is beside the point. A series that has “Meet Me in St. Louis,” “The Harvey Girls,” “The Wizard of Oz,” “Girl Crazy” and a score of others is going to be entertaining no matter where you land. What I might recommend is something that seems a little off of the main track, the first film with Judy in it that I ever saw—back when I was six years old. That would be the 1962 animated feature “Gay Purr-ee,” in which Judy provides the voice of Mewsette, a Parisian cat who suffers a series of trials and tribulations before an inevitable happy ending. In addition to the delicious voice of Hermion e Gingold, the film also has several wonderful Harold Arlen-E.Y. Harburg songs. It provides a nice sense of continuity to hear Judy still working with the same guys who wrote “Over the Rainbow” more than 20 years earlier.
    And just one more thing: the Film Society’s web site has a very entertaining extra. Cashing in on Judy’s reputation as one of the all time great storytellers, they’ve put up some of her own commentary on her films (see it at http://www.filmlinc.com/blog/entry/judy-garland-in-her-own-words). You’re sure to laugh at least once, and you’ll be even more anxious to see her films again.
    Steve Barnes is a freelance writer based in New York City. His work has appeared in such publications as ARTnews and the Wall Street Journal.
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  • Columns

    Kjoy's Life in the Sr Lane: What's the etiquette on that?

    July 28, 2011 /

    Kimberly “Kjoy” Ferren

    Of all groups on this planet, I did not expect that the lgbt community, especially the gay boys, would need an etiquette book, but apparently we do – at least according to Steven Petrow, aka Mr. Gay & Lesbian Manners. He’s even written a book about it. Who knew we didn’t know how to come out or ask for a date , or… wait a second, come to think of it, all of this was a near disaster when I came out. Okay. A “self help” book/site for young lgbt’s seems appropriate. But do the seasoned among us need this? It got me thinking about all the faux pas I’ve committed over the years. God/esses, there have been some doozies! And who better to correct our mis-directions then a gay man. Sorry ladies, but overall unless you grew up in high society, we lesbians, especially when we first come out, are a bit lost on etiquette of lgbt-isms and the like. We tend to go right for the more radical side of our history: stop shaving, cut our hair militantly, no bras (don’t we regret that now that they’ve taken a downward slope!); live on brown rice, and eat from plates made on a potter’s wheel. Those were the days! For me things were a bit different growing-up. I was lucky. I had a mom who appreciated manners and we traveled the world so we saw all sorts of social settings. The reason manners mattered was that my mom was literally raised a “holler” in the backwoods coal-mining area of southwest West Virginia. It was a true (unfortunately) ‘Coal Miner’s Daughter’ story (and worse). But my grandmother believed that just because they were poor country folk didn’t mean they had to be uncivilized. That attitude was forwarded on and she would take me, my brother, and some neighbor kids, out to dinner once a month to learn proper etiquette. That also meant I had to wear a dress! How she loved turning her tomboy into a girlie-girl whenever possible, so maybe these lessons had an ulterior motive. Anyway, there we’d go to the Camelot Smorgasbord all dressed up, and from the time we got to the car to the time we got home we were to do be gentle ladies and men. I wanted to wear my brother’s tie, but that was not going to happen (I sure did in college though!). At least I had cool shiny black patent-leather shoes. Flash forward. When I came out at 19 I was blessed to find my lesbian mothers, Diane and Cece. What this meant was this couple took me under their wing and brought me into lgbt society. Actually they threw me into the fire, for Diane was an uber-lesbian in Los Angeles, a feminist wonder-woman fighting for women’s rights, lgbt rights, renter’s rights, hell everyone’s rights! Next thing I knew I was sitting at a table with then Mayor Tom Bradley, petrified someone would ask me ANY question. All I could think of was, ‘at least know which fork to use’ (thanks mom!). These two lovelies took me everywhere, brought me into the lgbt world amongst older (sexy!) womyn, and eventually I found my voice and my own radicalism through to proper adulthood. They were so proud, and still are. So I guess it’s not so crazy there is a website & book to help coming-outter’s (young & seasoned), or for straights to get it right about lgbt society (“straight talk”). We all need an etiquette connection in life, and though as a lesbian it pains me to say, outside of our moms, it’s usually a gay man.]]>

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    New poll finds dramatic shift toward marriage equality

    July 28, 2011 /


    Rings we got last year, now just waiting for a license.

    The dying gasps of the anti-marriage forces can be heard loudly in New York, where a suit has already been filed to overturn the marriage equality law (it will certainly fail) and annul all the marriages taking place here. And now a new poll finds that attitudes are shifting rapidly in equality’s favor, even among seniors, a group that has been reliably opposed. From Politico: In a new polling memo intended to shape politicians’ decisions on the question of same-sex marriage, the top pollsters for Presidents George W. Bush and Barack Obama jointly argue that support for same-sex marriage is increasingly safe political ground and will in future years begin to “dominate” the political landscape. The pollsters, Republican Jan van Lohuizen and Democrat Joel Benenson, argue in their memo, which can be read in full here, that support for same-sex marriage is increasing at an accelerating rate and that the shift is driven by a politically crucial group, independents. They are expected to unveil the memo, which was commissioned by the group Freedom to Marry and shared exclusively with POLITICO, at a press conference at the National Press Club today. ]]>

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  • Healthcare

    One-third of workers have access to partner benefits

    July 28, 2011 /

    dropping their domestic partnership coverage. From the New York Times: WASHINGTON — In the first comprehensive count of domestic partner benefits by a federal government agency, the Bureau of Labor Statistics found that about one-third of all workers had access to health care benefits for same-sex partners. Bureau officials added two questions about domestic partner benefits for same-sex couples to the National Compensation Survey, a sample of 17,000 businesses and local governments, as a response to growing public interest in the topic, said Philip Doyle, assistant commissioner at the agency. The results were made public on Tuesday. Thirty-three percent of state and local government employees had access to domestic partner health benefits for same-sex couples, the survey found, slightly higher than the 29 percent of employees in private companies.
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  • Interviews

    Interview: Robin Webb from A Brave New Day

    July 27, 2011 /

    By Rick Rose Editor’s note: Recently, lgbtSr’s Rick Rose wrote here about his experience with HIV/AIDS 30 years on. Knowing that I was born in Mississippi, and himself living in Louisiana, Rick asked his former co-host from their days on WGEM in Quincy, IL and now on-air with Mississippi Public Broadcasting, Karen Brown, who to talk to about AIDS in the South. Karen introduced Rick to Robin Webb, an inspiration behind A Brave New Day, whose mission is to provide education and services and to advocate for people faced with life-challenging illnesses and conditions. RR: There is power in the name of your organization. How did you choose A Brave New Day? RW: Our organization is built on two complimentary principles, one, that personal empowerment is key to survival when faced with any life-threatening disease or condition and two, that every moment of every day must be fully embraced. For most of us in A Brave New Day’s peer survivor community, life and death literally tugs at you every morning you wake. It takes courage to take a deep breath, dust yourself off, dust the past off, endure the pains, the struggles, and choose life. I chose a Native American branding for A Brave New Day, using as our original logo a brave on a horse under the first light of day. He is essentially naked, surrendered. He is bowing to the sun with his spear at his side, clearly intent on conquering the day not so much with alpha force, rather in a state of humility and awe. For anyone who faces profound daily life challenges (don’t we all?), that image says it all. RR: 30 years into AIDS, is it really a pandemic anymore? Do people still care? How do you keep education and awareness alive? RW: We are still seeing 56,000 new infections in the US alone every single year. That number has not decreased for the last decade. American attention spans are short, particularly around HIV. Furthermore, people have always wanted to box HIV, to say “it’s just a gay thing” or “it’s just a black thing” or “it’s just this group that gets it or that group that gets it.” How far can one be from the truth! The virus knows no color or gender or sexual preference. We try very hard to continue speaking to the media, to continue offering community trainings and to advocate both on the local and national levels. Most of us who do federal advocacy, especially in DC, find ourselves fighting harder and harder to just hang on to medical and support services that already exist, which seem destined to be cut in this current political climate. This is discouraging, since we need ten times what exists now, to fight this pandemic. And oh yes, it’s still a pandemic. There are nearly 40 million people living with HIV and or AIDS on this planet today. There is a death from AIDS every 9 minutes. RR: The gay man you were then (as HIV entered your world) vs. the gay man you are now (as a senior, technically)? RW: Same man, different day, not so much different gay. Life goes on. You have a choice to say things like, oh I’ll never get intimate again, I despise my sexuality because of this virus, if only this if only that, but HIV is such profound experience. It teaches you who you are in no uncertain terms. It terrifies its host; it forces truth out of us. I have matured through this experience of aging with a lethal virus in my body and my psyche, so yes, externally speaking, I would have had a profoundly different life if HIV had never come knocking. Funny thing, though. Gay remains gay. Gay is gay is gay. Thank God it’s not a whim that just goes away if life circumstances go all wrong or if your partner dies, like mine did, or if a virus comes along. So if there is a deadly virus inside me, there is also “gay” my body and “gay” in my psyche as well, and for me that is a beautiful thing, nothing could be more life affirming.
    RR: What is the ONE key difference between “AIDS in the South” and AIDS in the rest of the United States?

    RW:     The ONE key difference is – are — those TWO S’es with a line drawn through each one. $$, ching, ching. The South has been shortchanged, in terms of federal dollars and in many cases, nearly 10 to 1, for a long time and yet the epidemic has moved to the South. Putting it another way, the 10,000 PLWHA in Mississippi do no look the same in the eyes of the federal government as 10,000 PLWHA living in cities like Chicago or San Francisco. Housing assistance for people whose lives have been shattered, social support services, even access to life-saving medications, all components of comprehensive care are severely challenged in the South. Why is this? Because the feds just don’t like Southerners? No. Because since the beginning of the AIDS epidemic, before HIV really hit the South as hard as it is hit today, major urban areas built local advocacy into their infrastructure. They fought for their own, rightfully so. I know, I was there, I was a New Yorker during the 80s and 90s. We fought hard for every pill, every life-saving support service we got. We got empowered. We “ACT-ed UP.” The South just needs to build its own advocacy community. Southerners need to get louder about HIV/AIDS.

    RR: It is 2011, when will the walls of ignorance, fear and discrimination come down?     RW: I can only answer that for myself. Those walls are already down. For society, probably never. History seems to send that message. However, it doesn’t mean we have to stop trying. Jesus said it all. Love one another. Buddha, Lao Tzu, Rumi, Muhammed, Mother Theresa, Ghandhi, Confucious, King, they all agree. We have to keep saying it, love one another. That’s the best we can do. RR: As a LGBT Sr. who will you support for US President 2012? RW: I’d like to see President Obama get re-elected. However, he must get tougher on HIV/AIDS. We felt such promise around HIV when he got elected, however, his track record ain’t so good. Yes, he inherited a national catastrophe and yes, he’s dealing with very stubborn, very dis-compassionate non-progressives. But we now have waiting lists for people needing life-saving medications, numbering over 8,500 Americans. Although most of the responsibility is that of individual states, and they haven’t done their job, the President has the power to step up to the plate and do something about making certain all Americans living with HIV have access to critical medications and stable housing. He loses my vote if he does nothing. RR: Share with me about one individual we have lost who would have the most impact on your mission today, if s/he were still alive.

    RW: There are so many. Hundreds, in fact. That is no exaggeration. My dear friend Trey Mangum died just last month. I am beside myself. The cause of his death was a heart attack, at 37 years old, just having received his PhD. in Social Work. For several years he was Executive Director at Grace House here in Jackson, a transitional living facility for persons living with HIV and/or AIDS, then Trey became Director of Housing at NO AIDS Task Force in New Orleans. I can already feel the impact of not having Trey around. I miss his mentorship and his support for our organization. However, when someone like Trey leaves the planet so suddenly, with so little explanation, his legacy and post-life presence seem even more intense, so I always have that to keep moving forward. Trey is one reason we keep on forging ahead. The hundreds of others I have known and lost, all of them equally significant, are also reasons to keep marching on. RR: If AIDS ended tomorrow, what would your next life be? RW: An avid hiker in Zion Park, Utah, Canyonlands, Grand Canyon, Glacier National Park, Bryce, Capitol Reef, Yellowstone and Yosemite. Oh wait, I already do that. A world traveler, 77 countries, all 7 continents. Oh wait, I just did that, still doing it. A fierce voice for social evolution and justice. Oops been there, still doing that. Write songs, work-out, appreciate every day. Hmm, already claimed. Ah well, I guess I wouldn’t change a thing. (Antarctica was cold.)]]>

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    Ft. Lauderdale makes play for gay honeymooners

    July 26, 2011 /

    Nice try.  Ft. Lauderdale is hoping to attract same-sex wedded couples from New York looking for a honeymoon spot. I have mixed feelings, given Florida’s very anti-gay ways. We were visiting when the ads were running for Prop 2, to amend their state constitution prohibiting even civil unions.  It passed.  Still, a lot of us have friends and family there. Just hope you don’t get hospitalized and discover your marriage license is meaningless. Link below.

    Florida beach town woos New York’s gay newlyweds | Reuters

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    Review: 'West Side Story Dance & Sing-Along' in Prospect Park, Brooklyn

    July 26, 2011 /

    By Steve Barnes I don’t think I’d ever been directly told to snap my fingers before, but I was willing to go for it. The person issuing the command was Lawrence Goldhuber, a dancer and choreographer who was standing on stage at the Prospect Park Bandshell. Mr. Goldhuber was dressed as Officer Krupke, the portly beat cop whose job it was to try and keep a bunch of gang kids under control in West Side Story, a film that hundreds of sweltering Brooklynites had shown up to see on one of the hottest nights of the summer. And snapping my fingers wasn’t all I was supposed to be doing. The finger-snapping was just a part of the “West Side Story Dance- & Sing-Along,” part of the Celebrate Brooklyn series of outdoor performances that runs for most of the summer in the park. In addition to snapping along with those cool kids as they sauntered down Manhattan streets on the big screen in front of us, we were meant to sing and dance along with them as well. There were a few problems with that, however. The promotional material for the evening told us that Mr. Goldhuber was going to teach us some of the show’s famous steps, but the lessons consisted of just a few humorously executed sidesteps and pirouettes followed by a request that we get up and dance along with the characters whenever the spirit moved us. To help us sing along with the characters, subtitles showing the song lyrics were supposed to be projected onto the screen during each number. But there were a few snafus with that as well. Sometimes the lyrics were out of sync with the music, sometimes there were no lyrics projected at all, and in a few cases lyrics to songs from other musicals managed to find their way onto the screen.
    But none of that really got in the way of the genuine pleasures of the evening. Before the film, a discussion between Scott Foundas of the Film Society at Lincoln Center and Henry Krieger, who wrote the music for Dreamgirls, set things up. And after Mr. Goldhuber’s pep talk, the sky got just dark enough for the film to get going. And, thanks to several large groups of the show’s fans in the audience, the feeling of a group singalong did take place. One side of the audience was labeled as the seating area for the Jets (the multi-ethinc grab bag of “white” kids), the other side for the Sharks (the Puerto Rican kids). The Sharks side of the crowd had many more worthy villains to hiss and sneer at, as well as “America,” one of the show’s best numbers (see it at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NPlcE3GcoFc) to get on their feet for. But the whole audience was completely swept up the songs, the dances and the story. Except for the singing, the crowd was amazingly quiet for an outdoor summer event, with almost no one getting up to head for the concessions. The centerpiece of the evening, the film itself, unsurprisingly proved itself a classic once again. For me at least, it’s one of those movies that really does seem to get better every time you see it. I’ve never really understood the people who think of it as dated (including the show’s lyricist and book writer, Stephen Sondheim and Arthur Laurents). It’s one of the archetypal New York movies, having much more in common with Scorsese’s and Sidney Lumet’s best work than with any other movie musical. It creates its own dream world without losing any of the grittiness of the slum streets that these kids exist on. The next time you see the film, after you’ve marveled over the Bernstein/Sondheim songs, the Jerome Robbins dances, and Rita Moreno, you might want to look behind the characters at something else that really distinguishes West Side Story. It’s one of the most amazing looking movies I can think of, designed by the great Boris Leven. Leven uses both actual city streets (many of which were bulldozed to make way for Lincoln Center soon after shooting finished) and sets that are real masterpieces of scale and color. Even Saul Bass’s closing credits, composed of a series of weathered doors and street signs, would make a memorable short film of their own. And the setting was a wonderful complement to the movie. Somehow it just seemed incredibly right to be seeing this film in a quintessentially New York spot, with a warm wind blowing, and the sound of the city audible in the distance. It made it very clear how much the city we live in now has in common with the one in which Tony and Maria act out their tragic story. Even if that had been the evening’s only strong point (which it wasn’t), it would have made the “West Side Story Dance- & Sing-Along” a worthwhile event.

    Steve Barnes is a freelance writer based in New York City. His work has appeared in such publications as ARTnews and the Wall Street Journal.     ]]>

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  • Latest

    NAACP panel on LGBT issues missing the B and the T

    July 25, 2011 /

    From Just Out: The NAACP is hosting its first-ever LGBT town hall Monday as part of its 102nd National Convention, The Advocate reports. “Black members of the LGBT community share a common history and continued struggle to address issues of bigotry, yet their identities, talents, and leadership are oftentimes diminished because of homophobia and fear of physical violence,” said Benjamin Todd Jealous, NAACP president and CEO, according to Out Smart magazine. “It is important that we address these issues head on.” But many are pointing out the bitter irony in the fact that an event meant to illuminate marginalized queer identities does not include panelists representing a transgender or bisexual perspective.
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  • Interviews

    Interview: Bertis Shankle, Manager of Volunteer Programs for SAGE

    July 25, 2011 /

    I had the pleasure of meeting Bertis Shankle, the Manager of Volunteer Programs for SAGE, when I took their volunteer orientation a couple months ago. He conducts these sessions every second Wednesday at the LGBT Community Center in Greenwich Village. I’m a big believer in the mission of SAGE and in creating visibility for older LGBT people in general, and was delighted when he agreed to this interview. – Mark McNease Not everyone knows what SAGE is. Could you say a little about the organization and its mission? BS: SAGE stands for Services and Advocacy for GLBT (Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender) Elders. The mission is encapsulated in the title, to serve the older adult LGBT community through advocacy and services. We’re here to enrich the lives of this very important population. You gave us a bit of personal history at the orientation. I know you started out as a volunteer yourself. What brought you to SAGE? BS: I had heard about SAGE from several different people. My then-partner had suggested I do volunteer work just after 9/11, which allowed me to be more flexible with working, but kept me involved. I was his caregiver. He had Hodgkin’s disease and was doing chemotherapy. We traveled a lot and he slept about 12 hours a day. So I had lots of time to give. We parted ways just as my tenure began as the “Thursday Coffee Boy.” I worked my new job schedule around my regular gig at SAGE. I did that for a year, until my work schedule changed and I went to regular Monday through Friday. I also had a regular Lend-a-Hand assignment, which lasted a year and a half, until my Friend at Home passed away. (He already had a Friendly Visitor who did all the paperwork, so I got to visit regularly and enjoy Henry’s company just like a Friendly Visitor.) You’re now the Manager of Volunteer Programs. What was the progression from making coffee early on to being in the position you have now? BS: I came into the office three years ago to see the Volunteer Coordinator, Ryan. I had done sporadic events volunteering after my other two assignments ended. So I was just dropping in to see what was the next need. He said he was leaving to further his fine arts studies, and I should consider applying for his full-time, paid position. I considered it about 20 seconds and threw my hat into the ring. I had always loved it here. I’m going to assume that managing volunteers is rewarding and also challenging. What are some of the realities of your job (are people reliable, for instance, do you get many cancellations, do you have to maintain a steady new supply of volunteers)? BS: You assume correctly about rewards and challenges. I often refer to myself as the center of all love in the universe. I help people find positions they can really enjoy, so the volunteers thank me. The people that are receiving the benefits of their services thank me. And then the work gets done, and my bosses and coworkers thank me. The rewards are not small in that way. But, yes, it has its challenges. It’s the nature of volunteering to get more cancellations than you would with a regular paid job. People have busy lives outside of our walls. I walked in those shoes, so I know that it can happen. We have to roll with the punches. I try to build in redundancy, but some of my projects I oversee are in Chelsea and my office is at the LGBT Community Center, so I sometimes wish I had a twin so I could be at two places at one time. But it runs pretty smoothly.
    For people looking to volunteer, what is some basic advice you would give them? BS: Look to do what you love. A volunteer who is happy in her role will be of the best use to the organization they are hoping to serve. Rule number one of volunteering in my view is: Have a good time. I worked for a while in a recruitment advertising agency that tried to find the right person for every job, and it looked deep into each position to find the triggers that would attract the right candidate. I have to think on those terms, a little… but at a hundred miles an hour around here. One thing I heard from others at the orientation, and that was a driving idea behind this site (lgbtSr.com) is that lgbt people over 50 often feel as if they’re being disappeared. Is there anything you could say to address that sense of diminishment as we age? BS: That’s totally understandable. The gay magazines have youthful cover models, mostly shirtless, dancing, tanning, swimming. And mostly white males. How much of our lives is that, even at that age? How many of us ever fit that body type? So much more of what we are as a group is under-represented. But it’s also kind of like a wedge of cheese sitting in the produce aisle and crying, I’m so alone. If he were in the cheese aisle, he’d have a totally different experience. We are the cheese aisle for LGBT mature adults. Is that cheesy? That people feel diminished says they need an organization like SAGE and then need to work to find their niche here. We’re not all things to all people, but there are programs and groups and classes that address all types of people and the full range of interests. Not to knock the youth, we could all learn from one another. We do a lot of intergenerational programming. What I’m hoping is that people are going to have a better chance of finding like-minded people when they get involved at SAGE. Lastly, what’s your hope for SAGE in the future? BS: There are lots of great additions to our roster of services coming in the near future. Our executive director, Michael Adams, is a real visionary. But the best answer for what the future of SAGE needs can be boiled up into one word. You. Everyone has something to contribute. Not just as volunteers. Just by being a part of SAGE events, you add to the enjoyment. If you have needs, like social services or counseling, we grow as we serve our community. The more lives we touch, the more we are able to do. We just had an event out on Cherry Grove to honor a longtime SAGE Volunteer Harold Seeley. He has done the decorations for our socials for about 22 years and been involved in the community for many years more than that. Harold is a leader, but first, Harold was a joiner. He came to an event, he rolled up his sleeves, he got involved. And his life has been so rich because he dared to do something. Harold is my hero right now. He’s battling some health issues, but he’s never put down his glue gun. You should have seen him out there on the island, among his people. He’s the reason we exist. I’m especially inspired right now. It’s a great time to be part of this community. Don’t get me started! LGBT older people tend to experience higher rates of social isolation than their heterosexual counterparts, and they are more likely to be single, to live alone and to not have children or close family members to rely on for care giving. SAGE programs combat this isolation and help LGBT older people find support and services to improve their quality of life. Some of the programs we offer to LGBT older people in New York City include the Friendly Visitor program (where we match volunteers who pay regular visits to people who may be homebound); Lend-a-Hand visits (shorter-term, task-oriented errands and escorts); events that bring people out to mingle, classes to enrich people’s lives; and other programs to meet specific needs like care giving, job readiness and social services needs.]]>

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