Mark McNease On Topic Substack Teaser
The following is just a tapas plate from my Mark McNease On Topic Substack. Every Monday musings you can subscribe to HERE. It’s free!
First, a big hello to new subscriber Steve! We encountered each other on Bluesky. Steve is a very nice addition to the Tree House. At this rate I’ll have to get a contractor in soon and expand the place. Anyone know a good elf?
From the Editor’s Desk
I wonder if this should be called ‘From the Trenches,’ considering what’s happening to the country.
When is a friend not a friend?
Something I struggle with is the sense of betrayal and mistrust I now feel toward anyone I know who voted for Trump. There are people in my life who made that choice, and yet I know them as ‘good’ people who don’t display any malice. And yet … and yet … I feel like a Jew may have felt in 1933 wondering who among my neighbors and friends would protect me, and who among them would direct the Gestapo to my door.
I won’t ask them, but I can’t shake the feeling that I already know. It’s one of the many reasons I left Facebook: my life, our life, is precious and I won’t put it on display for anyone who isn’t appalled that Black history and experience is being erased from our federal government. Spanish-speaking Americans, and their language, are now of no consequence to the regime. Women’s reproductive freedom is something we once imagined. And LGBTQ lives no longer matter in any way.
The biggest loss is trust. I no longer trust them for anything beyond light conversation that reveals as little of me as possible. I no longer trust them to even know, let alone react to, each day’s horrors as the country rushes headlong into autocracy. The explanation that they may be ‘low information’ voters falls hollow. It is a choice, not an excuse. They have made a choice, and so have I. My life is strong, long, persistent, yet beautiful and in some ways fragile. It is not for their eyes. As a writer, an artist, a husband, a friend, a cat lover, a man who had been a child aware of the acute distrust required to navigate this world, I know who will hold the door as the bad men arrive … they held it wide open just months ago, and they have stepped aside.
Actually, we can
(Photo: Clinton, NJ, library writers’ group)
Among the many talismans spread around my work (sacred) space is a simple wooden block with the words, ‘Actually I Can’ on it. It’s been a reminder every day that life isn’t over till they put a small hand mirror under your nose to make sure you’re dead. Until then, as Saul Bellow said (and Anne Sexton quoted in her Pulitzer Prize winning book of poetry ‘Live or Die’), “Live or die, but don’t poison everything.”
I’m living as fully as I can. The photo is the Clinton New Jersey Library adult writers group I just started facilitating last night. I don’t call them students. I prefer ‘participants’ for everything I’m doing. I even said last night, “I’m not a teacher. I’m a facilitator.” I want to facilitate other people’s creativity and desire to express themselves. That’s what I hope to be and do. This past year (2024) the universe showed me a different road to take if I was willing to let go of some of the baked-in ideas I had about who I am and what I can do.
I love to teach (I’ll allow myself to use the word in this context). I love sharing my 50+ years of experience and skill. And I love being good at it! My favorite part of book readings was the conversation with the audience afterward. People kept telling me I had a talent for talking to people, that I become animated and enthused speaking about writing, and they were right.
It invigorates me. It challenges me. It humbles me (as much as I’m willing to be humbled), and it reminds me that I have something to offer even now.
Let go, let goodness, and don’t be afraid of being someone new … that person, with those talents and gifts, was there all along.
