Kjoy's Life in the Sr Lane: When babies had four legs

Kimberley “Kjoy” Ferren It used to mean when you said in the lgbt community “I just love my baby,” you meant your cute, beautiful dog or cat. Children were of the four-legged kind, sometimes two-legged (birds and monkeys), and some even went to the exotic like reptiles and snakes. Whatever the non-human species was we loved them as if they were our children. Family for us has always come in all shapes, sizes and species. Our loved ones, our pride-n-joys, have been special, BUT they pooped outside and drank and ate from bowls on the floor, though sometimes they had fancy houses or beds of their own. And even though we knew we’d have a wonderful time together as a family, outside of obedience school and vet bills there was never the need to set aside funds for a college education, bar mitzvah, quinceaneras, or wedding. I have never been picky about who came to be part of my families. And although I’ve always been a sucker for the mutts, I did have one pure bred babe, Westie the West highland terrier. I got him in a pet store. I didn’t know what a puppy mills back then. For years now I’ve made up for this by fundraising for the SPCA and Human Society, so chill! All-in-all, I’ve love(d) each of them, but didn’t believe (nor could I afford), to over-the-top pamper them. No, they all lived good, solid suburban lives. FACT: Life in our community up until the mid-1980’s was centered on our pets (and the occasional children from straight encounters). But that has changed now. Instead of pets from shelters, or kittens found under the house, or bought from reputable breeders, now suddenly actual “children” are constantly bursting forth from the loins of lesbians, turkey-bastered by gay-boys, or incubated in surrogates, or others adopted. The trend has turned from our “four-footed-friends” as our kids, to walking on a leash beside babies in four-wheeled strollers! This has not only changed what “family” means to lgbt’ers, but more animals now left in shelters (kidding!), AND also how we as a community spend our leisure time. It has changed our social paradigm.
A few years ago, Corinne and I went to the West Hollywood Pride Festival. In years past, we’d met up with our friends at a bar or on the grassy median. Once we’d all set-up our chairs for the parade, we’d rotate into the bar and drink, laughing loudly. Those who were single flirted with the lovelies, danced, then we’d pop out from time-to-time to see the parade-and womyn. THAT YEAR, 2009, was different. Instead of finding a group of wild womyn, we found those who we used to party with cooing at babies and toddlers, pushing four-wheeled strollers, and sitting on blankets without sports team logos on them, but Pooh Bear. The area was strewn with baby bags, formula bottles, and changing care supplies, and everyone was drinking (un-spiked) juice packets! And even more importantly, there WAS NOT ONE FOUR-LEGGED ANIMAL IN SITE! No. They no longer were the alpha love magnets, the “baby”, they were at home, relegated to the yard for disturbing the real baby. As we stood there trying to look interested, what knocked me in the gut was that, I sincerely felt the “breeders” we had all teased and protested against due to their hate of our lifestyles were now living amongst my lgbt’ers. Having children had successfully infiltrated the lgbt world and turned Santa Monica Boulevard into Sesame Street! At that moment amidst baby wipes all I could see was images of their mothers screaming in a birthing video. This wasn’t a child’s sandbox, but an adult’s playground day. I couldn’t see what our friends saw, so needless to say, after we kissed our friends and patted the babies on the head, we high-tailed it to the bar, then later the festival and had a great time. All our friends left early for nappy time. Today, although I still believe that we’ve assimilated a little too much sometimes, the truth is that this whole procreating thing has become another progression of the lgbt lifestyle. Like it or not, lesbians and surrogates having babies are here to stay. So for today Corinne and I absolutely IN-LOVE with our four-legged BABIES and are fully satisfied with filling their water bowls and buying them squeaky toys and treats, all the while signing petitions to allow ALL lgbt’ers the right to have the family of their choice. And being that we are SR’s, truthfully, taking the pups for walks is all we can handle most days!]]>